Finding Balance: A Journey Through Eating Disorder Recovery and Alcohol Addiction

January 30, 2025 Justin Hayes

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In this episode, I share my deeply personal journey regarding my relationship with food, which has been shaped by various factors, including my mental health struggles, hospitalization, and ongoing efforts to maintain balance. Food is not just a source of physical nourishment; it also plays a critical role in emotional and mental well-being. My experience illustrates why this relationship is vital for everyone and how it can evolve over time. Through my discourse, I aim to foster understanding among listeners seeking guidance in their struggles with food, cravings, and mental health.

Reflecting on my life prior to my hospitalization in 2017, I became aware of how restrictive my eating habits had become. I found myself subsisting on just carrot sticks and plain hummus, an unfortunate manifestation of the stress and burnout I was experiencing. With low energy and consistent fatigue, food had essentially become a source of anxiety rather than comfort or sustenance. Upon entering the hospital, I was finally in a safe environment where I could address both my mental health and nutritional needs. A nutritionist assessed my situation and structured a meal plan that introduced three meals a day—a stark contrast to my previous habits. This shift was not simply about the food itself but also about redefining my relationship with it.

The concept of nutrition in a clinical setting opened my eyes to how our perceptions of food can influence our overall health. During my time in the hospital, I realized that my previous views on eating were colored by misconceptions and fears. I had become convinced that I was allergic to every food except for a few safe choices that kept me in a cycle of neglect. My experience with a clinical team highlighted the importance of working with professionals who could guide my journey toward a healthier relationship with food. I learned quickly that quality meals were essential for emotional and mental well-being, and I was encouraged to explore various foods I enjoyed rather than avoid them.

One of the significant challenges was adapting to medication that impacted my cravings and urges. I became aware that some medications might increase my cholesterol or enhance cravings for sugary or salty snacks. This is a common issue that many face, and I speak candidly about it, hoping to encourage those listening to be more mindful of their consumption and the medications they take. It is essential to decipher actual hunger cues from cravings influenced by biological factors, and I had to learn how to navigate this transformation responsibly.

Self-reflection reveals how food occupied a central role in both my highs and lows. During my years pursuing fitness, social events often revolved around nightlife and alcohol. My relationship with food became wrapped up in patterns of restriction and excess. When I contemplated hospitalization, my decision to seek help stemmed from a profound fear of losing control—both over my diet and my mental health. Fortunately, that choice led me down a path of recovery and self-advocacy, where I learned not only about food but about my ultimate responsibility for my well-being.

Every individual's experience is unique, and while some might not face the same battles I did, many can relate to the struggle of having a conflicting relationship with food. This episode stands as an invitation to reflect on your own choices and how they affect your mental and physical health. By advocating for oneself and understanding the comprehensive role food plays in life, we can cultivate a more enriching existence free from guilt and shame. My story emphasizes that while the journey to a better relationship with food can feel daunting, it is also transformative and rewarding.

As I continue to walk this path in 2025, embracing all the ups and downs of maintaining a healthy lifestyle, I remain dedicated to supporting others through my organization, Voices for Voices®. The collective experiences and insights gained through this journey allow me to share knowledge and foster healing among individuals who may feel stuck in their narratives concerning food and health. Each interaction, each challenge faced, and each victory claimed reinforces the belief that we are all connected in this ever-evolving journey towards understanding ourselves better and leading healthier lives.

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Finding Balance: A Journey Through Eating Disorder Recovery and Alcohol Addiction | Episode 170

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