The Voices for Voices Podcast Episode 39 with Guest, Author, Speaker and Law Changer, Kathy Picard
Welcome to the Voices for Voices podcast sponsored by Redwood Living
thank you for joining us today I am Justin Alan Hayes founder and
executive director of Voices for Voices host and humanitarian
you can learn more about Voices for Voices on our Instagram, Facebook, YouTube @voicesforvoices and our website voicesforvoices.org
Voices for Voices is a 501 C3 non-profit
charity organization that survived solely on donations so if you are able to please consider heading over to Voices for Voices.org to help us continue our mission and the
goal and dream of mine to help three billion people over the course of my
lifetime and Beyond or you can also send a donation to the
mail address of Voices for Voices at 2388 Beckett Circle in Stow Ohio 44224
and we're also now on the cash app so you're able to donate that way too at
our handle is Voices for Voices are you or somebody you know looking for
a volunteer opportunity if so, you can reach out to us today at
president voicesforvoices.org now I founded Voices for Voices to share
and provide a platform for folks to share their stories with others as we
work to break the stigma around mental health accessibility and disabilities
while also helping people get the help, they need by sponsoring them financially
and also helping them prepare and or transition into the workforce with the
Voices for Voices Career Center where we connect Talent with opportunity
for both job Seekers and employers from coast to coast and in every job industry
and job level and who can forget about merchandise the Voices for Voices merchandise shop is finally up and running at voicesforvoices.org forward slash shop
where shipping is always free and again all donations are 100 percent tax
deductible today please join me in welcoming today's guest
award-winning author and inspirational speaker from Ludlow Massachusetts
Kathy Picard thank you for joining me today, Kathy
thank you for the opportunity to speak Justin we go way back and it's
quite an honor to see Voices for Voices grow and as it needs to be you know it
needs to be able to help other people and that's what it's all about networking is huge and we need to offer support help and resources to all that we can like I said so that you can reach your Millions goal and you can do it anybody can and one of the things that I
say is never say never you know baby steps take it a little bit at a time and
that's where you started and look where you are today, I'm so proud of you oh thank you and for our viewers for our
listeners if you're reading our transcripts or captions Kathy does go way back with voices for
voices when we were a once-a-year event, and she was one of our keynote speakers
where she was able to as she has and continues to do share her message her
experiences and continue to empower and Inspire individuals not only in
Massachusetts through legislation which I'm sure she'll touch on a little bit
but also through books through words through pictures and she never
takes time off but probably like me and that's because we do, we
believe that we can help as many people as we have as a vision and so when we
get a call or an email or a text to be able to share our messages
I know that Kathy is definitely a person that I want to be able to give
the platform to now that we are have morphed into the non-profit or
organization that we are today so Kathy why don't why don't we start uh
the conversation with your experiences and what has brought you
to the point where we met and had
you speak at our event way back a couple years ago and then we can
transition to what's happened since what's on the outset for you what
how can people find more about you about your work and just learn how
to be inspired sure I appreciate this very much so
again I'm from Ludlow Massachusetts and my story is like many stories
sexual abuse so I was abused as a child from the age of seven until I was
17 years old today I'm 60 years old the thoughts the feelings they never go away
but by talking about it that helps by getting the right people in your circle
that helps but you just have to like I mentioned before you have to take baby steps so being sexually abused as a
child that was not in my plans I did not know what to do I did not think that it
was wrong I just I was getting Love by my stepfather, and I thought that it was
okay you know I was getting told the words I love you my mother never said those, but my stepfather would give me
the gifts The Grooming process that you hear that all took place, and it would continue on again until I
was 17 years old and at 17 years old that's what I found out that my stepfather was not my
biological father and my mother said I didn't have to have you if I didn't want to, and I said well
what are you talking about and that's when she just disclosed that he's not your real father
and so he would approach me and have say Kathy one more time let's
you know being abused and I said this has got to stop it's not right I used my
voice to put an ending to it and he begged and begged one more time Kathy and I said if you keep on asking, I'm
going to tell and that's when my abuse stopped so it's using your voice that's why voices for
voices is so important because it is really an important thing to do it's important to use your voice and I as a
young girl I never had that opportunity I never was told in school that you
should tell you should tell your parents you should tell your teacher go to the police department you know I never was
that was never on my agenda of what to be told what I should do in fact my
stepfather who was the abuser was an auxiliary police officer, so I was even more petrified if I go to the police
department who are they going to believe are they going to believe me or him being one of them so that was one of the
reasons why I did not go to the police department and people say you know they blame the victim
why didn't you tell well I did tell I told when I was nine years old, I told my
grammy my mother's mother and you know what she said she said Kathy we don't talk about this
so I thought that what he was telling me to shut up don't talk about it if you talk about it your parents are going to
get divorced it's going to be your fault your sisters are going to go here you're gonna go there your dog's gonna be taken
away you're going to be in a foster home, so I was petrified and not only that but
him being an auxiliary cop being threatened with the gun in the home being told you're going to be shot I
mean why would this little girl that was me tell when I was being threatened so
at 17 years old when it when the abuse stopped, I still didn't really go forward
but I told my Aunt Judy my mother's my mother's sister and she in fact said again don't talk
about it because she was very afraid of my stepfather my stepfather was an
alcoholic and a lot of people were afraid of him, so he was just a big bully
to many people so I didn't tell, and I kept the secret because my Aunt Judy
said Kathy if you want to talk to me, you can but please don't tell anybody else promise me and so I didn't tell anybody
else my Aunt Judy passed away in 2000 and I kept that promise as soon as Judy
passed my first stop I took off I went to the police station filed a report
because at that time I was still afraid of this big bully monster, but I kept on telling everybody I told
my workers I told my neighbors I told my friends I told everybody and I still
have not stopped since then so my voice is being told as you mentioned Justin I've reached as far as Serbia doing a
zoom in Serbia because they're more upon the speed of Technology during the covid
time so I reach out to as many people as possible by zoom in person and you know
and sharing things that I've accomplished in my life you know going out I speak at the police academy I
educate our police officers and they need to hear it from a Survivor that your voice and your eye contact are
extremely important and maybe that person's not ready to disclose their abuse for obvious reasons that I know as
a Survivor they may not understand it but when that person's ready they are
going to remember your actions that you really show code that you cared and
that's very important but not only going out and speaking I speak at Correctional Facilities I speak
to ours to the staff yes level two and level three sex offenders and people like you're crazy how do you go in and
talk to these predators and I'm like they need to know what a Survivor has
gone through and it's very important so going to universities but I go to
where I'm asked to go and it's really healing not only for me but for
other people to see that yes, I was sexually abused for 10 years and one
time is too much but I have made something of it I have not let that kept
me behind because I deserve a happy healthy life, I've been married for twenty-five
years to my soulmate Gary who supports me who's there for me and you don't need
to take somebody that that's not deservable of you deserve to be happy just like I am you know not to be
in a domestic violence situation you don't deserve that so don't put that
Band-Aid that oh I don't deserve it yes you do and sometimes it may take time I
didn't get married until I was thirty-five you know sometimes good things take time is what I always say
but I did I helped to change the laws in Massachusetts and that was huge
achievement of mine going forward after being told there's nothing, I can do about it
because the time has expired for me to take my stepfather through a trial and
get the justice that I deserve, and I did do that I fought I called I emailed I
even had one Aid say Kathy you're bothering me I'm like too bad you need to do your job I'm a taxpayer you need
to do your job don't tell me that I'm hounding you, so I did I changed the civil and the criminal
statute of limitations in Massachusetts and they were huge June 26, 2014, the
statute of limitations the time frame when someone can go forward actually
change from 21 years to a person being 53 years old that was a huge jump that's
the Civil that's means monetary the Predator does not have to register as a
sex offender nor do jail time which I still believe that they need to register
for a sex offender these bills are still being looked at still being hopefully
going to change the criminal change on September 21st, 2006, that
was extended where a victim has until the age of 43 years old to go forward
that would entail having to register as a sex offender and jail time I could not
do the criminal but I was able to follow suit with the Civil the monetary one so
my trial I had a four-day trial the laws changed in 2014. my trial was the
following year November 2nd, 2015. I had a four-day jury trial it was up to these
eight jurors to decide the fate of my stepfather and there's no proof you know I'm 53
years old when I was going through it there's no proof, but it was my word against his word and
the jurors found in favor of my story because it's the truth and that was huge again helping to
change the laws the other accomplishment Justin that I did, and the listeners is I wrote my
story my husband and I we wrote no don't laugh but it's life with my idiot family
and it's a True Story of Survival courage and Justice over childhood
sexual abuse that's my story we named it life with my idiot family
because my mother and my stepfather either called us idiots or ass holes Us
for girls growing up the book is on Audible that I spoke my
husband spoke along with my private investigator Lewis Berry; it took us five years to write this and
to say that it was not hurtful you know a lot of crying nights
but it was a story that needed to be written and I'm glad that we did do it
and I'm glad we put it on Audible my husband wrote the screenplay, and we are
hoping to get the screenplay into a movie and again Never Say Never So it
possibly could happen you just don't know but I'm working on that
the other thing is I wrote a children's book when I was a young girl my mother
my stepfather I was never read a book I was plopped down in front of the TV and
told to stay there so to write a children's book was huge for me so I did
I wrote a children's book called I love you so much that dot and it's a
really cute book it's for kindergarten you know two to six or nine-year-old
depending on where the child is in their learning stage
but it's a cute book it's an educational book and it's I love you so much that I
ask you to brush your teeth I ask you to wear a coat not to talk to strangers that your private parts are private and
a lot of the kids will say well no or why and it gives them the reasons of why
they need to do these particular lessons in my newest version the Expanded
Edition has an activity section for the kids, so it's really cool it's a
really cute book and the illustrations are very bright and engaging to the kids and actually this week I read it to 132
Kids kindergarten through third grade and through my sponsors eight sponsors
each of those children were able to take a free book home for the adult in their
life to reread it to them so that they can stay safe and that's what it's about
it's about keeping Kids Safe safer and I'm happy to say that both of my books
are on websites of common organizations including child USA child help and mass
kids of Boston so that's an honor to have them there as a resource for
parents and for teachers thank you for sharing and being so
transparent and really concise that that was amazing how I can learn a
lot from how you were able to consolidate all those just
terrible experiences that you had to go through for many years when you
did reach out and getting negative feedback of well you know we
don't talk about this and those things that children care about you know
their family staying together their pet like those things are big so
when those are held over the head yeah well if you
share if you talk to too many people and the wrong people in their eyes the uh
that some of those things could be potentially taken and I know that it
brings you kind of that cathartic process when you share your story, I'm
I don't know that I don't think you like you relive in any of those moments, but I think when the page and
the new book of the laws being changed the trial being able to speak to
our audience at our first annual Voices for Voices event and all the
police departments the prisons the jails the schools now with your latest
Expanded Edition can you just speak about how that makes you feel that you
are now helping people and kind of what keeps you motivated to do that
for you know somebody who's watching or and listening saying wow to endure
and have to go through what you did is hard enough but then to sit down and write book you know book and then do
the audio version which obviously it's audio so you're speaking the book
which is talking about the experiences that were truths and so all those
mix-mash emotions and reliving can you maybe just expand on that a little bit
yeah, Justin, you know it is hard to do some of the things I do have
guard rails in my way and as you know you know I've been fighting the
fight over 20 years and it's just very alarming with the statistics one in
every four girls before her 18th birthday and one in every six boys before his 18th birthday will have been
sexually assaulted and it's not by strangers people that are teaching stranger danger that curriculum needs to
go because ninety-three of these abusers are known to the victim
they enter into their home be it a teacher a coach a babysitter a neighbor
a friend so they are going right into the home and people may not think because they're not scary they're not
these scary looking people that you think they're going to be abusers these people you know my stepfather works for
Toys for Tots you know they just they know the games that they need to play
but one of the alarming things one of the hurtful things to me is that some of the people that I
approach and those doors are not opening and that's scary because it's not about
me it's not about teachers it's about the child you know think of me going
home from school and being that little girl being afraid wearing those feet
pajamas in the night and hope that he's not going to touch me, but he does he still Taps me on the shoulder and has me
go downstairs you know those are things that are going to happen unless we help these children
you know I don't charge for most of my speakings and it's not about the money
it's about the safety of these kids because if we don't help them, they could
not turn out like I have and be have that inspiration or you know that's why
we talk about the traumas you know them going through the drugs and the alcohol
and the suicide and the bullying that could be because they were being sexually abused you know so we need to
and I need to and I'm still doing the fight of having these schools these
superintendents these teachers allowing me to go in and read my book
and one of the things that they don't like is because on one of the pages it
says the words private parts why I'm not saying the other words so
what is what is so wrong with private parts these kids today they know they're
they're being handed condoms you know they know more than we want them to know
what their age but we need to have that conversation
and not to deprive them of being safer
it and to expand a little bit on what you're saying that the
conversation it definitely does need to happen and
as now a father of a four-year-old uh
and knowing your story and the Avenues and all the hard work and all the doors
that are open and all doors are closed and how all the different methods and
trying and trying and trying and the perseverance that you have you know I'm faced with that of
certain books and to the point about we don't like you know private parts
those words being in the book I'm thinking along those lines of do we as
parents as people that are trusted uh
let me say trustful trustworthy parents or loved ones or somebody like
yourself come in and stepping in and reading a book how do we want
the children to learn about certain things do we want them to learn from us
or do we want them to learn from their friends now there's going to be some things that
we just can't get in front of everything that when children are at school and
conversations and play time and there's things that we just some things we can't
control but some of those times where we make my wife and I still make it a point
to read to our daughter and when those
books with different types of words I just and it's just interesting is it the
last week or so there's a couple books that I picked up and I and I'm like well
do I read this to her or don't I and then but it's after the fact now that
I'm thinking well do I want to be the one to introduce or to share this
particular conversation of somebody dying you know that you know why
where's gray Grandma where's Great Grandpa in those instances are they
going to come back and in in that context of will do I want to share that
or do I want them to learn and from at
school with their friends and I think that we just need to as Society we
just need to get over that and I need to get over that personally as that and thinking
through that luckily, she's four and I'm working through that, but I can
totally understand that there are people maybe like my myself just in that
thought process of oh you know we don't want to share this we don't I don't want to get a call from a parent that says
that they were read a book and these words were used instead of saying we're actually educating them we're
sharing information we're helping the situation that you might they might not
see a result right now but it might be 5 10 15 years where something that got
conditioned into them you come in and speak in and sharing your story and reading a book and sharing experiences
that that could have a lasting impact and I know as a college instructor
the there are things that I just I don't say I throw a ton of information at them, but I do in the hopes the one or
two or three of those experiences that I've gone through the good the bad the
ugly that some of those things in addition to the vocabulary and the different
processes that that sticks with them and when I get feedback sometimes it's several years later of a student going
through a situation and them referring back to a case study that I wrote or some
experience that that I spoke about and if I hadn't done that they might have
been in a different position so for you to do what you're doing to
continue you are making people better by what you are doing and
maybe the parents are upset in the moment but to have and have their son or
daughter being taught and having this in their head that they're going to maybe
think twice if they're in a situation that they might step away
and I even I invite the parents Justin the parents can come in because I want
them to bring that conversation home and yes, I'm not the mom I'm not the dad in that relationship and I get that I get
where my place is I am just trying to give them a resource yes and I just wanted to if I may just to read that
what the wording is in the book it's the book is called I love you so much that and that particular page is I
love you and I want you to be safe so much that I want you to keep your private parts private why because
private means we don't show or share them with other people is there a time when it's okay for someone to see your
private parts and on that page is a picture of baby bear in the doctor's room with Dr a bear listening to the
baby's heart so it's okay for a doctor to for the private parts with the
permission from the parents because as we know there has been reports with doctors abusing, we just had one locally
but you want that child to be able to say with permission you may see my
private parts because you're right if an adult if a teacher if somebody doesn't
explain this to the child then you know what the perpetrator is the one that's
going to be educating this child the perpetrator is going to be able to say it's okay if you show this to me
you know because they haven't been told otherwise that it's wrong so that's why
it's important to talk about it you know one of the things that I tell the kids
when I go out and read, we interact, and we talk about other things, but I say to
the children I say I have a very important question for you are you ready and they get all excited and I said if a
stranger says to you can you come and help me find my lost puppy and I will give you
so much candy and so much money now remember this is a stranger raise your
hand if you would go and there are still some that do that I
had one little boy say my father is a police officer and of course I would go
you know but it's not a onetime any of these lessons are not a one-time conversation it's all the time talking
about it because these situations are happening all the time you know the youngest this is sad and pathetic but
the youngest that I heard is a two-month-old baby being sexually abused it does happen we don't want to
acknowledge it we don't want to talk about it we need to have these conversations we need to stop this from
happening and we need to protect our children we do and
it is it's just crazy that it's gotten you know to the to this point
where the guard really the guard rails are up towards people who are
trying to help versus the people that have
ulterior motives and I think a little bit not the exact same of course but
just with the opioid and the Fentanyl and all those things that are happening the conversations for whatever
reason that we don't want to whether it's label somebody or we don't want to
offend somebody but if the thing is actually happening it's a fact and so
when the thing in the experiences you went through, they happen so those are facts you're not sharing and
sharing information that you wouldn't if you had your own children the when
when you go and you speak and when you're when you're thinking these words through, and I know that it's just as an
author and trying to put words together which I sometimes it
takes me a little bit longer to do than other people but when
that it took you time and thoughtfulness to put that together and even thinking
about your first book it took you five years so there's lots of thought and how
how do how does this experience get said in a certain way in your husband helped
and Wordsmith and all those things and I think if people saw and heard and
understood that that it's not just you saying oh I want to go read in front of
132 students the there's a message but
there's also that thoughtfulness behind it yeah and that's what some people you
know I still I still get people there's Kathy again talking about it again it's
like you know they just don't understand the importance of it and nor do they
want to because it's too much thought it's too much for them you know I get some of the schools but what is a half
an hour to an hour me going into the school and talking to these kids I mean
what is the big deal you know again you know around the country the world they're taking books off shelves and
this and that and it's really sad they're missing a lot they're missing
these resources that really can help and I just cringe sometimes when you know
I call up superintendents and they don't even return my calls, but you know there
are laws speaking of laws there are laws in effect now bills that they're looking
at to make it mandatory that these schools do talk do touch on sexual
abuse you know like I mentioned child help child help has research based
curriculum for pre-k all the way to 12th grade to educate these kids so that it's
not scary and it works you know we are limiting some of these
numbers to lessen them i s you know I just one incident I spoke with a doctor
the other day four victims told their story to this doctor four in one day it's so common
sexual abuse is so common we need to talk about it because you
know what some of these survivors they may not be in the position I'm in right now I think I'm a very strong person
now more so than when I was a young child or a teenager, but they may not be
that strong and then go through like I said this the drugs the suicide the alcohol but and they self-blame
and I'll be honest I did self-blame I thought it was my fault I would say to
myself why didn't I tell sooner did I like it why did I not tell
but now looking back I did tell I told at nine I told it twenty-eight you know but nobody
was there to protect this little girl you know my mother knew about the abuse
even when I was a young girl, she knew what was going on and she didn't protect
her daughter and that's sad but it's very common and it's not just women it's
men too because they're a woman abusers but they don't protect and my way of
thinking about it is they want to stay in that situation for just to have someone in their life or maybe just
financial reasons but they don't protect the children and that's sad but it's
happening and that's why we need to let these kids know that if you're not getting the help in the family, you need
to tell your teachers you need to go to the police department you need to go to your neighbors your babysitter and to
the important thing is Justin is they need to keep on telling until somebody
helps them it could not be a one-time shot deal just like counseling if you go
to a counselor and you and you that counselor failed you need to keep going to another
counselor to get the help that you need, and I'll just say one example that I had
I went to a counselor and this counselor as soon as I walked in, she's looking at the clock and I
thought oh I must be bothering her I gotta hurry up and tell my story and
then when I told her my story her advice to me was Kathy you need to forget about
it and go on with your life and I'm like okay I'm paying you a twenty copay and
you're telling me to forget about it well I never returned to that counselor and my way of counseling that's helped
me is talking and I feel like I'm just helping other people helping myself
and you know I'm not saying not to say that I don't see a counselor because I
do maybe once or twice a year I do see a counselor because everybody needs some kind of help every now and then right
not to be ashamed of it and it's a male counselor and I never thought that I
would feel comfortable telling my complete story but I do share it and I
have shared it with my male counselor who in fact took the stand during my
trial and was there to support me during my four-day jury trial wow if somebody is
going through a situation similar to yours or another
illegal not right not moral what however want to classify what are the steps that
they can take that now in you because you were doing it throughout
the years but now the just the explosion of social media and this information
being put 24 7 365 in front of everybody how
how and what should they what should somebody do, who should they talk to how
should they continue when you talked about you know talk and share until somebody listens who would be maybe like
the individuals to like that they should go through or
work with like I don't know what to do like do I call them police right away or do I tell if my mom my dad my aunt my
grandma if you touched on that a little bit yeah, I just think what they need to
do obviously is I've been saying this during the conversation is to is to tell
keep on telling don't shut upkeep telling until you get the
answers that you need going to your local police department going to D.A seeking an attorney you
could call an attorney the first time is usually consultation is free but if you don't
get the advice that you're looking for don't stop and I'll tell you the
first attorney I called because I knew I wanted to get Justice, and this is again
pathetic but I called this attorney's office, and I said the laws are going to change I want to go forward to get
Justice and show accountability on his part the attorney said to me
a well-known attorney for sexual abuse cases does your family have money
and I said no, and he said well I'm sorry I can't take your case
I'm like that was as bad as advice as the counselor but that's why I'm saying
sometimes these people just don't get it they don't know they have the wrong
language for you so you have to keep on going be your own advocate
go out take it one day at a time don't plan on doing it all in one week because it's
not going to happen and you're only gonna you're gonna you know it's you need to self-help you need to as I would
say eat that gallon of ice cream go for that walk talk to that friend you need
to self-help and just do-little baby steps and maybe one week you're okay you
can talk about it then the next week you just need time to yourself and that's okay because I've been on that roller
coaster too up and down up and down but today I don't shut up as you know but
yeah so, I think just find that person get that you know right advice you can
check out the laws you again one of the sources I gave
you child USA they will share with you on that particular website all of the
laws the statute of limitations for all the different states so there is a lot
of information out there you can reach out to myself my website is
kathypcard.com my children's website is I love you so much dot org you can reach
out I'm on Facebook I'm not too tech savvy Twitter and Instagram but more
or less on Facebook but reach out to me my email I'm
happy to share it is Kathy with a k and a y child advocate gmail.com again I
don't know all the answers I don't know of anybody that does know all the answers, but I have a lot of resources
that I am happy to share with your listeners and I appreciate that and
please send those email to me so we'll be able to include in our show
notes and then that will go into the search engines and route that way as well
and again to Kathy's Point she may not have every single answer but she a
has the unfortunate experience of going through the situation and the
experiences itself as well as the people to talk to reach out
resources to start and I think that's important because I know just to
bring it back to my own experience with kind of my mental health struggles
before I ended up getting emitted and getting the help there
were so many Hoops to jump through of have to go to a family physician then
the family physician has to refer and there's that period of time like well I don't I don't know if I want to do that
like it's an extra step and so just that thought process as well as all the
additional tests and then when I decided that I think I might need to talk to
somebody other than a family physician which they are trained but just not in in that the specialty that I need and
and I was being told well it would be a couple months until you're able to be
seen by a specialist and you have to be referred which meant I'd have to go back to the family physician
to be referred and then obviously then insurance comes in well what
insurance do you have oh well we don't carry that or and so there's definitely
just in life there's always Hoops to go through and a big reason that I want
to have and having Kathy what with us today in in our new voices for
voices podcast format to have her episode televised as well as on our
YouTube and all audio platforms and the transcripts is she has that tenacity
that perseverance the never give up so if it's sexual abuse if it's something
different that a message of takeaway is to just
continue calling continue emailing and I think that transitions
into the work that you're doing the reading in the schools the speaking
opportunities the podcast like ours and others that you you've been on to just taking those opportunities that
made those opportunities didn't happen 10 years ago or at a specific time but
when they come you like me is like okay yeah, I'll do that let me let me let me
get my availability and let me do that because they're so passionate about what we do and what we're the message
that we're sharing and I and I think for listeners for viewers
readers to just to know that yes there's somebody that has that tenacity that
perseverance that it really is trailblazing and has trailblazed the way
that you've already enabled and had legislation that has changed to the
positive for the victim and so you've done a lot a lot of phone calls a
lot of emails a lot of in-person visits and other communication methods
just to be heard and there will be sometimes as you've mentioned the doors
will shut for whatever reason but when that door opens, and it might seem like
wow do I really want to share to this potential event or to this person like
who's that really going to help but in the end of the day that leads to in just
the way life happens it leads to other opportunities to be able to share and in your case to be able to share through
the words on the page and through pictures and speaking opportunities
to be able to read where read to students versus
the years back the things they and the methods that we use they just change
over time whether it's covid where we're able to bring you into the studio through Zoom now if Kobe wouldn't have
happened I don't know if the opportunity if the conversion would have
happened as seamless as it has but when that happens it's like oh my gosh I
we need to get people that are as passionate as we are the opportunities
to share so while we might not be the largest podcast, we still have a
reached as throughout the United States and other countries and for you to
have reached Serbia and through the event that you spoke for
Voices for Voices a couple years ago we had feedback from Singapore and as
you know Allison one of our speakers she's in Australia and I'm and maybe
some of those connections you're able to touch base and they're able to share a post or like and be able to do
things that way that it doesn't always have to be money it can be little things of wow like I have a network that I can
share this and it might be seen by somebody that could have a use for
it and then an email or a call could happen, and it might be in a day it might
be in a month it might be in six months we just don't know but you're you are a prime example of that perseverance and
I think it's just amazing that there are people like you and I out there that
we might not get the airtime as other may be talking Heads other
individuals and we're trying to do a heck of a lot of good in the time that we have here on Earth because you
know we want to we want to leave kind of our Network and our lives and the
people and yeah, we want to have that that letter leave our Legacy behind, and you know
right after right before going through the trial I want to share that you know I had a brain tumor my doctor had called
me in and said you know I was feeling dizzy, and my doctor's office see they didn't even know they said you have
vertigo and I said no something's wrong and I'm not even a doctor but everybody knows their own body and so they didn't
MRI and I had a brain tumor and right after the trial I had that removed and
knock on wood but thank God I'm good I'm good I've got a lot more to do and
like you said we need to leave a legacy behind and there are some people that are here on Earth that they don't do
anything and I mean if I were to pass tomorrow, I'd be happy because I know that I made a
difference and you're right sometimes we don't know who we touch you know some
people reach out some people don't we might get a call tomorrow we might get a call in five years but it's about we
know that we have helped people how many we don't know but we know that
our stories our voices can truly help so many that's why we
don't shut up Justin we keep going that's right and you know my book
the children's book is in a couple months by then it should be done but I
actually am making it into bilingual so it's going into Spanish, and I've been
asked to put it in Portuguese but I said you know it all costs money right yeah
so I am I am making it into a bilingual book so I'm very happy about that so if that and you know if the
movie could take place my husband could retire and but right now he's got to work
because somebody's got to pay the bills, but you never know you know I put my
pants on just like these actors and actresses and you know never say never you know and
just take it one step at a time don't say oh I wish I didn't do that you
know self-blaming is huge you know I wish I didn't do that well
would have could have should have you don't know there's a reason behind everything and sometimes we don't know
that reason for years to come but sometimes things happen, and they happen
for a reason and it's out of our control but just know that you are doing the
right thing by stepping forward and sharing your story and getting the help that you need or that you can do for
somebody else you know help somebody else don't be selfish you know if that person if somebody
comes to you and says I want to talk to you take the time then because that person
if you walk away that person is going to say I forgot about it I don't remember
it wasn't important it was important because they approached you and be that
person for them that is one thing that I always tell people if somebody wants
your help please listen to them right then and there listening is free doesn't cost anything
if somebody is asking to speak with you speak to you to me there's a
reason there's something on their mind it could be serious or could not be serious but there is a
reason and I just want to reiterate to our audience our listeners or
viewers if you are in a leadership position if you
have the ways the means please reach out to Kathy for speaking
appearance to come to your classroom to read her children's book
that really is helpful and it's positive change that need needs to
happen and what better way is to help at a younger age to help them a
little bit earlier in life so that can help them later in life instead of after
potential negative bad experiences legal
things have happened if you're a university president and a professor uh
if you own an organization sexual abuse happens in the workplace too, please
reach out to Kathy her information as well as being on the podcast itself
will be her contact information ways to get in contact with her in touch with her we'll be in the in the show notes
and Kathy is and I'm not just saying this as
you know having you on the podcast but she's really a good person
and has the goodness in mind and the thoughtfulness when she is sharing her
message so if it's a word that you might not agree with that being said or in a
there's thoughtfulness and reasons and some things just have to be said
to get a point across there's only so much tiptoeing around an issue or an
experience of getting an important point across and so knowing that
there is thoughtfulness and knowing how much time goes into the work that she has and continues to do that that's
important so if you're on the fence if she's reached out to you or
somebody like her has and wants to share with students with a
church group whatever what a prison a jail it doesn't matter we're all human
beings and we can learn from somebody who unfortunately has been through some
tough experiences and again Kathy like me we're here to
help people we're not here to we're not here to hurt people we're here to help there might be some words that
get used that might sound like well that's being mean and that I don't want that to be said I just take you back to
early in our conversation where we're talking do you as a parent a teacher
somebody of importance and Authority that is doing the right thing do you want to be the person
sharing information or do you want that person that is up to up to no good do
you want them to be sharing that information again going back to Kathy's asking the students
about if a stranger came up said asking about the puppy and had a large amount
of candy would you go with them do you want Kathy and somebody that has
the good naturedness in her in the helping and want to have
prepared somebody for a potential negative situation that they could totally avoid or do you want that
stranger do you want them to be sharing that information that's really what we're what we're talking about here so I
want to want to thank you Kathy for joining us on the Voices for Voices
podcast again if you just want to maybe talk about a couple of the methods of how
people can get in contact with you sure so they can reach out
kathypcard.com is my website or my
children's book I love you so much dot org is for the children's book and
again I just want to say the children's book is also paw signed by my featured dog Abby the kids love that so
so it's really cute baby showers you know they're asking for a book now
instead of a card one request that I have for the listeners, and I ask every
time and if you could please support me and go to Amazon and do a
review of my three books that are on Amazon that helps me more than you know
to show that you to in fact support my mission and my book so to go there
and to do a review even if you put good resource that helps me to me like I tell
everybody it's like I scratched a scratch ticket that morning when I check because I check every morning did I have
a review and I'm like Yay but you could reach out that way my email is
Kathy with a K in a y child advocate gmail.com please reach out I'm on
Facebook and I want to thank you for your time, Justin
thank you, a million times, over you're welcome anytime and this won't be the
last time we're talking so I'm happy to have you to see you to see uh
the positive change that you're enacting and that you're taking that perseverance and continue and you just
continue to help one person at a time and that's one less person that has to
go through a difficult situation so we thank you for your time today and we
want to thank you our viewers our listeners checking out our transcript
for joining us on the Voices for Voices podcast and a big thank you to our
guests from Ludlow Massachusetts Kathy Picard for responding some of her
time with us today and until next time I am Justin Alan Hayes, and we hope that
you have a great day and be a voice for you or somebody in need
[Music] [Applause] [Music]
Please donate to Voices for Voices, a 501c3 nonprofit charity today at: https://www.voicesforvoices.org/shop/p/donate
#thankyou #justinalanhayes #501c3nonprofit #charity #charityfundraiser #organization #podcast #recoveryispossible #nonprofit #mentalhealthmatters #advocate #disabilityinclusion #stigmafree #erastour #taylorswift #taylor #youbelongwithme #maroon5 #memories #music #guitar #studio #singing #voices #thevoice #sing #epic #alternative #recovery #accessibility #501c3nonprofit #501c3 #abrandnewday #sponsor #legacy #voicesforvoices #thanksbrain #podcast #faith #mentalhealth #mary #jesus #christmas #holidays #motherteresa #survivor #motherangelica #angels #ewtn #stjudes #donatetoday #givingtuesday #givetoday #donate #support #share #gift #human #goingviral #viral #news #media #mentalhealthishealth #theinterview #interview #art #expression #arttherapy #suicideawareness #depression #anxiety
#mentalillness #ronaldmcdonaldhouse #2023 #gala #substancefree
#sleep #nutrition #nontoxicpeople #foofighters #davegrohl #davidgrohl
#taylorhawkins #chesterbennington #linkinpark #recoveryjourney #mensmentalhealth #podcast #project #video #voicesforvoices #501c3 #501c3nonprofit #nonprofit #acceptingdonations #trendingnow #share #addiction #recovery #mentalhealth #addictionrecovery #love #sober #sobriety #soberlife #recoveryispossible #depression #anxiety #mentalhealthawareness #wedorecover #onedayatatime#healing #health